How much of this has been my own fault?

I recently had this really profound thought. You know one of those thoughts that causes you to stop what you're doing a re-evaluate your life? Well, that is exactly what happened to me. While knitting away one evening after my husband had gone to sleep. I began to wonder, "How much of the troubles in your life were caused by your bad decisions?" I almost dropped a stitch! We are so accustomed to blaming the world, the devil and people for our unhappiness that when I pondered this I was shocked. I began to inventory my life. Beginning with relationships and the fact that I don't have many friends. Oh! I have the fleeting friendship that ends up being a disconnect when the investment becomes overwhelming but life longs pals...not that many.

The minute a friend corrected me I would tell myself, "It's better to let them go. They think they are better then you anyway." But the Bible says, "Wounds from a sincere friend are better than many kisses from an enemy." Proverbs 27:6 (NLT)

Or when a friend offended me I would say, "I don't need them! I don't have to allow myself to get hurt." But the Bible says, "Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others." Colossians 3:13 (NLT)

 I began to think about how many times I felt like I was taken advantage of by others. And I would grumble and complain, then withdraw from the people. The Bible says, "Give, and you will receive. Your gift will return to you in full—pressed down, shaken together to make room for more, running over, and poured into your lap. The amount you give will determine the amount you get back." Luke 6:38 (NLT)

"This is my commandment: Love each other in the same way I have loved you." John 15:12 (NLT)

"For God is not unjust. He will not forget how hard you have worked for him and how you have shown your love to him by caring for other believers, as you still do." Hebrews 6:10 (NLT)

At the end of all my thinking I realized my lonely feeling wasn't caused by God, the World, or Satan, it was really caused by me and my poor decisions. And I remembered what the Bible said, "Then if my people who are called by my name will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sins and restore their land." 2 Chronicles 7:14 (NLT) When I chose to humble myself and confess to God all the mistakes I had made. He was free to heal my heart and those situations didn't seem so grim. I now had hope.